Going at it, right now?

We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can't scoff at them personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me.

–Jack Handey

Report: Someone Totally Doing It Somewhere Right Now

Scientific evidence proves that, in fact, someone is going at it right now. I'm willing to bet that it is not you. But if it is you, leave a comment about it before you're done, because that would be an impressive feat.